When I was about 10 years old I got up on stage in front of my whole school and recited a speech I wrote titled “The Person I Most Admire.” This person wasn’t some famous pop star who I saw on TV and wanted to be like as you might expect from a 10 year old, this person was someone who sat in the audience with no idea who or what I was going to speak about. I decided it’s about time I renew my speech, because this person most certainly deserves the extra gratitude.
This person has put me first my whole life, loved me and cared for me through the best and worst times of my life. They have picked me up countless times and always encouraged me to follow my dreams. Not only would I not be alive without them, I would not be the woman I am today without this person.
Surprise- it’s my mum.
I’m not going to waste time thanking her for all the usual stuff – feeding/clothing/spoiling me – because that’s not really why I admire her the most. Over the past eight months my mum has been through what no mother ever should. She has held my hand, every step of my journey. She has had her heart broken by every negative test result and she has sat through appointment after appointment where doctors poked and prodded me. She has had to watch my life fall apart, only to scoop up the pieces and put me back together again.
She has demonstrated so much strength and courage that has helped me build my armour and be the strong woman I am today. Not just in the face of my illness, but in every challenge and hardship I have experienced in my life, she has been my rock. I admire her for being such a strong, beautiful, independent woman who raised me in such a way that I feel equipped to handle any of life’s challenges.
She is the most kind hearted, beautiful soul who would literally give me her last dollar if I needed it. She would go to the worlds end to help me no matter the cost. She has the biggest heart. She has told me on several occasions that she wouldn’t even have to think about trading places with me – she’d do it in a heartbeat. She has taught me that life is challenging but that’s what keeps it interesting and the way we grow from these challenges is what defines us. She has shown me that sometimes you need to make decisions that aren’t easy and leave you vulnerable – that the best decisions aren’t the easiest ones.
I don’t know when it happened but one day I decided that she was not only my mum, but she is my best friend and has always been. She is the first person I go to with good or bad news. She is the person who I vent about all my problems to and she is always there to listen, with a hot cup of coffee.
She once tried to tell me that she wasn’t perfect but I had to disagree. A mother who puts her child first, loves and protects them, inspires and encourages them is a damn perfect mother in my eyes. Honestly though, there isn’t a thing I would change about my mum – I think she’s perfect.
Throughout my illness my mum has stepped up and gone above and beyond. She has gone through this rollercoaster of emotions with me and helped me come out the other side. She has supported me emotionally, financially and physically.
This Mother’s Day, I can’t shower you in the gifts you deserve but I can use this opportunity to say thank you for everything you’ve done and continue to do for me every day. I will never be able to express how much I appreciate you.
I hope someday I can be half the woman you are.
I love you.
Finding Rainbows in the Dark 